The boy and his coin

As I was jogging my way this morning, I saw a boy by the side of a narrow but busy highway intently looking at the middle of the road.  I realized that he was waiting for a chance to pick up a coin that must have fallen off from the pocket of his loose school pants while running to his school.  But a lot of vehicles were fast passing by that by the looks of it, he will never have a chance of being able to retrieve his coin.  Then finally, a car stopped, perhaps the driver recognizing the coin and understanding the predicament of the boy.  Several other vehicles stopped behind the car but almost all where honking their horns obviously disgusted at the car that has just stopped.  But the driver patiently waited for the boy to pick his coin and return to safety before continuing his journey.

The scene led me back to a recent seminar I attended where as an “ice breaker”, the speaker let the audience loudly recite some sentences with the following thoughts:

I love my work and so I love to report everyday.

I feel valued as an employee.

I’ll have to do everything I can so I can get promoted.

The sentences made me ask my seatmate, “Don’t you think something is wrong with the third sentence?” I simply got a grin.  Perhaps my seatmate disagrees with what I was thinking.  My opinion is that in most workplaces today, there is that egocentric mindset among employees in advancing their careers.  “Doing everything” would sometimes include actions even if it means disregarding welfare of others.  It may not be direct but it is actually about harming colleagues.  It is understandable that when one gets promoted, one have the feeling of being valued and perhaps would foster love for work.   But how about others who may have been harmed in the process?  It is obvious not every one would get advancement in career at a single point of time and there a lot of other factors, but competition has got to be healthy.  Thus “doing everything” should be moderated to minimize egotism and cater more to solidarity at work.  It means “stopping” sometimes so others, just like the small boy, can have a chance to pick what is valuable to them.  But then life is a fast highway.

After getting to the sidewalk, the boy ran to the direction of his school.  I believe he was more than happy for having retrieved his coin which must be part of a meager pocket money for his snacks.  I wished the boy would one day remember that moment when a car stopped for him.  I wish that boy would also halt someday for others while reaching and even surpassing his own goals.

"Apay dayta naipullagid ta muging mu?"

"Apay dayta naipullagid ta muging mu?"

(What's that dirt on your forehead?)

My son wiped away the ashes on his forehead immediately after returning to his seat at church this morning. I asked him later why he did so and he didn’t offer any answer. I am sure though that he has in mind justifications which I presume would include 1) not fully understanding the ritual he just went through and 2) avoiding possible annoyance from his classmates when he would later go to school but just wouldn’t like to verbalize it.

This later slipped out of my mind until I met a friend who asked, “Apay dayta naipullagid ta mugging mu?”  I did not immediately answer.  In fact, I did not say a word until that person answered the question himself, “Ay wen gayam, As Wednesday tadta.” (Oh, I already know, today is Ash Wednesday.)

I think, people would like to avoid being asked these types of questions.  And one thing probably is to avoid a situation of being embarrassed or worse, even judged based on one’s answer.  One would be embarrassed for not knowing the reason for doing a thing, in this case, the ritual of ashes on the forehead.  And because it is a religious act, this can be easily a temptation for others to pass judgment like “agin-agin sasanto”(pretending to be saint).

Later, I was able to catch conversation among some young people I was following along the way.  One said to another “Ibabam ta buokmu tapno mailemmeng dayta kur-it ta mugingmu.” (Draw your hair lower so the mark on your forehead won’t be seen.)  This person went on to say, “Isunga madamdamaak pay makimisa tapnu rabiintun nga rumwarak ket awan makakita ti marka.” (Which is why I chose to attend mass late afternoon so it would already be dark when I gout of church).  The person being addressed seemed to agree with the suggestion but remarked, “Ngem makita ladta met ta ababa buokko. Ikattek na lang ngata?” (But it is still visible as I have short hair.  Maybe I would rather erase it?)  But a third friend said, “Nu haan nga tapnu makita, apay nga dita muging ti markaan da ngay? Dita kuma ubet ngarud ah.” (If it was not intended to be seen, why would they put the mark on the forehead?  The mark should have been on the buttocks.)

The conversation I was hearing brought me back to the exhortations before the marking.  The priest before inscribing a cross with ashes on the forehead would say, “Remember that you dust and unto dust you shall return.”  Another version is “Turn away from sin and be faithful to the Gospel.”  From both lines, one can discern that the ritual is an invitation for a personal reflection.  The first version of the exhortation deals boldly on the certainty of death despite the overwhelming desire to prolong life.  The second version conveys straightforwardly that the mark on the forehead is not about being religious but rather the admittance of one’s sinfulness.  Yet both would end up on the reflection on hope – that this world is not the final destination and despite sinfulness, there is a God who is all merciful and very much willing to embrace the repentant.

I soon heard those young people I was following discuss “when you pray, do not do it in public” thus those ashes as personal prayer should not be publicly bragged about or even displayed.  On the other hand there was that “we are called to witness for others and thus evangelization thru the mark of the cross needs to be public.”  My way was soon out of their way and I didn’t know how their conversation was concluded.  But I guess it did end up with agreeing that the ashes “nga naipullagid iti muging” is something personal that could move one to action which is public in nature.