"Apay dayta naipullagid ta muging mu?"

"Apay dayta naipullagid ta muging mu?"

(What's that dirt on your forehead?)

My son wiped away the ashes on his forehead immediately after returning to his seat at church this morning. I asked him later why he did so and he didn’t offer any answer. I am sure though that he has in mind justifications which I presume would include 1) not fully understanding the ritual he just went through and 2) avoiding possible annoyance from his classmates when he would later go to school but just wouldn’t like to verbalize it.

This later slipped out of my mind until I met a friend who asked, “Apay dayta naipullagid ta mugging mu?”  I did not immediately answer.  In fact, I did not say a word until that person answered the question himself, “Ay wen gayam, As Wednesday tadta.” (Oh, I already know, today is Ash Wednesday.)

I think, people would like to avoid being asked these types of questions.  And one thing probably is to avoid a situation of being embarrassed or worse, even judged based on one’s answer.  One would be embarrassed for not knowing the reason for doing a thing, in this case, the ritual of ashes on the forehead.  And because it is a religious act, this can be easily a temptation for others to pass judgment like “agin-agin sasanto”(pretending to be saint).

Later, I was able to catch conversation among some young people I was following along the way.  One said to another “Ibabam ta buokmu tapno mailemmeng dayta kur-it ta mugingmu.” (Draw your hair lower so the mark on your forehead won’t be seen.)  This person went on to say, “Isunga madamdamaak pay makimisa tapnu rabiintun nga rumwarak ket awan makakita ti marka.” (Which is why I chose to attend mass late afternoon so it would already be dark when I gout of church).  The person being addressed seemed to agree with the suggestion but remarked, “Ngem makita ladta met ta ababa buokko. Ikattek na lang ngata?” (But it is still visible as I have short hair.  Maybe I would rather erase it?)  But a third friend said, “Nu haan nga tapnu makita, apay nga dita muging ti markaan da ngay? Dita kuma ubet ngarud ah.” (If it was not intended to be seen, why would they put the mark on the forehead?  The mark should have been on the buttocks.)

The conversation I was hearing brought me back to the exhortations before the marking.  The priest before inscribing a cross with ashes on the forehead would say, “Remember that you dust and unto dust you shall return.”  Another version is “Turn away from sin and be faithful to the Gospel.”  From both lines, one can discern that the ritual is an invitation for a personal reflection.  The first version of the exhortation deals boldly on the certainty of death despite the overwhelming desire to prolong life.  The second version conveys straightforwardly that the mark on the forehead is not about being religious but rather the admittance of one’s sinfulness.  Yet both would end up on the reflection on hope – that this world is not the final destination and despite sinfulness, there is a God who is all merciful and very much willing to embrace the repentant.

I soon heard those young people I was following discuss “when you pray, do not do it in public” thus those ashes as personal prayer should not be publicly bragged about or even displayed.  On the other hand there was that “we are called to witness for others and thus evangelization thru the mark of the cross needs to be public.”  My way was soon out of their way and I didn’t know how their conversation was concluded.  But I guess it did end up with agreeing that the ashes “nga naipullagid iti muging” is something personal that could move one to action which is public in nature.